Adam Hibberd
In a wild and frantic attempt at seeming normal on the Bumble dating app, I have taken the extreme measure of no longer parading any of my talents which before were clearly putting any potential interested parties off.
From ‘multi-talented’ to ‘very ordinary’, this is the genius master stroke that could just change my life. I now await the hordes of prospective women rush to my profile and start chatting with me in a desperate attempt to win my affection before any of the competition get there first.
I know, clever, huh?